With or Without You

In 'With or Without You,' Domenica Ruta delves deep into the intricate tapestry of love and loss, showcasing the complex dynamics of familial bonds. The narrative follows the life of a daughter navigating the tumultuous waters of her relationship with her volatile mother, whose love is as fierce as it is frightening. Ruta's evocative prose captures the raw emotions and heart-wrenching choices that define their connection. As the story unfolds, readers are drawn into a whirlwind of addiction, betrayal, and ultimately, the quest for redemption. Will the ties of blood prove to be a blessing or a curse? Discover the haunting beauty of this beautifully crafted tale.

By Domenica Ruta

Published: 2014

""We are all shaped by the loves we have, the losses we bear, and the choices we make, tangled together in a dance of light and shadow.""

With or Without YouBook binding

Start Listening

0:000:00

What Readers Say About This Book

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A haunting, unforgettable mother-daughter story for a new generation—the debut of a blazing new lyrical voice NAMED ONE OF THE TEN BEST NONFICTION BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY Domenica Ruta grew up in a working-class, unforgiving town north of Boston, in a trash-filled house on a dead-end road surrounded by a river and a salt marsh. Her mother, Kathi, a notorious local figure, was a drug addict and sometimes dealer whose life swung between welfare and riches, and whose highbrow taste was at odds with her hardscrabble life. And yet she managed, despite the chaos she created, to instill in her daughter a love of stories. Kathi frequently kept Domenica home from school to watch such classics as the Godfather movies and everything by Martin Scorsese and Woody Allen, telling her, “This is more important. I promise. You’ll thank me later.” And despite the fact that there was not a book to be found in her household, Domenica developed a love of reading, which helped her believe that she could transcend this life of undying grudges, self-inflicted misfortune, and the crooked moral code that Kathi and her cohorts lived by. With or Without You is the story of Domenica Ruta’s unconventional coming of age—a darkly hilarious chronicle of a misfit ’90s youth and the necessary and painful act of breaking away, and of overcoming her own addictions and demons in the process. In a brilliant stylistic feat, Ruta has written a powerful, inspiring, compulsively readable, and finally redemptive story about loving and leaving. Praise for With or Without You “A luminous, layered accomplishment.”—The New York Times Book Review “A singular new coming-of-age memoir traces one girl’s twisting path up from mean streets (and parents) to the reflective life of a writer. . . . The burgeoning canon of literary memoir . . . begets another winner in Domenica Ruta’s searing With or Without You. . . . [A] gloriously gutsy memory-work.”—Elle “Stunning . . . comes across as a bleaker, funnier, R-rated version of The Glass Castle and marks the arrival of a blazing new voice in literature.”—Entertainment Weekly “Valiant and heartbreaking.”—Bust “Powerful . . . Ruta found an unconventional voice, a scary good mixture of erudition and hardened street smarts. Her writing is also, as they say in Danvers, wicked funny—though in her case wicked is more an adjective than an intensifier. . . . [With or Without You] hums with jangled energy and bristles with sharp edges. . . . Ruta writes with unflinching honesty.”—Slate “Bracingly funny and poignant.”—The Boston Globe “Exceedingly powerful.”—Booklist

Mike & Casey Show Logo

The Mike & Casey Show

Dive into captivating book discussions with our expert hosts

Key Points from With or Without You

About the Author

D

Domenica Ruta

Domenica Ruta is a critically acclaimed author known for her poignant and heartfelt memoirs and essays. Her notable works include the bestselling memoir "With or Without You," which explores her complex relationship with her family and her struggles with addiction. Ruta's writing is characterized by its lyrical prose and raw emotional honesty, drawing from her personal experiences to illuminate broader themes of love, loss, and redemption. Through her compelling storytelling, she invites readers into her world, making her one of the most compelling voices in contemporary memoir writing.

Book Details

Key information about the book.

Authors
Domenica Ruta
Published
March 2014
Publisher
Random House
ISBN
0812983408
Language
English
Pages
242
Genres
Contemporary FictionFictionLiterature

Purchase Options

Amazon logoBuy on Amazon
BookShop logoBuy via BookShop

Support local bookstores: BookShop gives a portion of each sale to independent bookshops!

Similar books you might like →

AmericanahBook binding

Americanah

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Anna KareninaBook binding

Anna Karenina

Leo Tolstoy

I Know Why the Caged Bird SingsBook binding

I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings

Maya Angelou

A Curious MindBook binding

A Curious Mind

Brian Grazer, Charles Fishman

Slaughterhouse-FiveBook binding

Slaughterhouse-Five

Kurt Vonnegut

But how Do it Know?Book binding

But how Do it Know?

J. Clark Scott

#GIRLBOSSBook binding

#GIRLBOSS

Sophia Amoruso

To be Mayor of New YorkBook binding

To be Mayor of New York

Chris McNickle

The Secret HistoryBook binding

The Secret History

Donna Tartt

The Writing ClassBook binding

The Writing Class

Jincy Willett

If on a Winter's Night a TravellerBook binding

If on a Winter's Night a Traveller

Italo Calvino

A Million Little PiecesBook binding

A Million Little Pieces

James Frey

The Rig VedaBook binding

The Rig Veda

The Secrets We KeptBook binding

The Secrets We Kept

Lara Prescott

Daisy Jones & The SixBook binding

Daisy Jones & The Six

Taylor Jenkins Reid

The Light We LostBook binding

The Light We Lost

Jill Santopolo

Self EsteemBook binding

Self Esteem

Virginia Satir

A Sound of Thunder and Other StoriesBook binding

A Sound of Thunder and Other Stories

Ray Bradbury

The LeopardBook binding

The Leopard

Giuseppe Di Lampedusa

The Rosy Crucifixion: NexusBook binding

The Rosy Crucifixion: Nexus

Henry Miller

The Nickel Boys (Winner 2020 Pulitzer Prize for Fiction)Book binding

The Nickel Boys (Winner 2020 Pulitzer Prize for Fiction)

Colson Whitehead

The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao (Pulitzer Prize Winner)Book binding

The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao (Pulitzer Prize Winner)

Junot Díaz

A Tomb for Boris DavidovichBook binding

A Tomb for Boris Davidovich

Danilo Kiš

Three Book Sebald SetBook binding

Three Book Sebald Set

W. G. Sebald

The Proud HighwayBook binding

The Proud Highway

Hunter S. Thompson

Dead GirlsBook binding

Dead Girls

Alice Bolin

Self-Made SuccessBook binding

Self-Made Success

Shaan Patel

The Seven Storey MountainBook binding

The Seven Storey Mountain

Thomas Merton

Take your reading experience to the next level

Download our mobile app to enjoy your favorite books on the go. Get access to exclusive features, offline listening, and personalized recommendations.

Download on the App Store

Book Collections you might like →

Dave Elitch's Book Recommendations

Dave Elitch's Book Recommendations

Dave Elitch is a renowned drummer and educator, best known for his dynamic and innovative drumming techniques. Though primarily celebrated for his contributions to the music industry, Elitch has authored several influential articles and educational materials on drumming, solidifying his reputation as a thought leader in the field. His work has been featured in prestigious music publications, where he shares his insights on rhythm, technique, and the art of performance. Elitch's dedication to teaching has also led him to conduct masterclasses worldwide, inspiring a new generation of drummers. His contributions have significantly impacted both the practical and theoretical aspects of modern drumming.

View Collection
Anthony Bourdain's Book Recommendations

Anthony Bourdain's Book Recommendations

Anthony Bourdain was an acclaimed chef, author, and television personality known for his deep exploration of global cuisine and culture. He gained widespread recognition with his 2000 bestseller "Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly," which offered an unvarnished look behind the scenes of the restaurant industry. Bourdain's literary talents extended to several other books, including "A Cook's Tour" and "Medium Raw," further cementing his status as a compelling storyteller. His groundbreaking TV shows such as "No Reservations" and "Parts Unknown" took viewers on culinary adventures around the world, earning him numerous awards, including multiple Emmy Awards. Bourdain's legacy endures as a pioneer who celebrated the richness of diverse cultures through food.

View Collection
Audrey Gelman's Book Recommendations

Audrey Gelman's Book Recommendations

Audrey Gelman is an American entrepreneur and writer, best known as the co-founder and former CEO of The Wing, a network of co-working spaces and social clubs designed for women. She has been recognized for her innovative approach to creating supportive environments for professional women, significantly impacting feminist discourse and workplace equality. Gelman has also contributed thought-provoking essays to prominent publications such as The New York Times and The New Yorker, where she discusses gender, politics, and culture. Her leadership at The Wing has been celebrated for fostering community and collaboration among women. Additionally, Gelman's influence extends to the political sphere, having previously worked as a press aide on several high-profile campaigns.

View Collection
Oprah Winfrey's Book Recommendations

Oprah Winfrey's Book Recommendations

Oprah Winfrey is a globally renowned media mogul, talk show host, and philanthropist. She gained fame through her groundbreaking talk show, "The Oprah Winfrey Show," which ran for 25 years and became one of the highest-rated programs in television history. Winfrey has significantly impacted literature through her influential book club, Oprah's Book Club, which has propelled numerous books to bestseller status and fostered a love of reading across diverse audiences. She is also the author of several books, including her memoir "The Life You Want," and has contributed to numerous inspirational and self-help publications. Beyond her literary contributions, Winfrey has been a powerful advocate for education and empowerment, founding the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa.

View Collection
Alicia Keys's Book Recommendations

Alicia Keys's Book Recommendations

Alicia Keys, an acclaimed American singer-songwriter and classically trained pianist, has made significant contributions to the music industry with her soulful voice and compelling lyrics. She burst onto the scene with her debut album, "Songs in A Minor," which earned her five Grammy Awards. In addition to her musical achievements, Keys is also a celebrated author; her memoir "More Myself: A Journey" provides an intimate look at her life and career. She has used her platform to advocate for social justice, co-founding the Keep a Child Alive organization to combat HIV/AIDS in Africa. Alicia Keys continues to inspire through her artistry and activism, leaving a lasting impact on both music and literature.

View Collection
Bob Iger's Book Recommendations

Bob Iger's Book Recommendations

Bob Iger is an American business executive and the former CEO of The Walt Disney Company, where he led the company through a period of unprecedented growth and innovation. Under Iger’s leadership, Disney acquired major brands like Pixar, Marvel, Lucasfilm, and 21st Century Fox, expanding its portfolio and creating one of the largest entertainment empires in the world. Iger is also credited with launching the Disney+ streaming service, which has become a key player in the digital entertainment space. His leadership style is known for its focus on creativity, long-term vision, and strategic acquisitions. Iger’s tenure at Disney solidified his reputation as one of the most successful and influential media executives.

View Collection
Anya Taylor-Joy's Book Recommendations

Anya Taylor-Joy's Book Recommendations

Anya Taylor-Joy is an acclaimed actress known for her captivating performances in film and television. She gained widespread recognition for her role as Beth Harmon in the critically acclaimed Netflix series "The Queen's Gambit," which earned her a Golden Globe Award for Best Actress. Taylor-Joy has also starred in notable films such as "The Witch," "Split," and "Emma," showcasing her versatility and depth as an actress. In addition to her acting career, she has been praised for her contributions to promoting diverse and complex female characters in modern storytelling. Her work continues to inspire audiences and set a high standard in the entertainment industry.

View Collection
Jacinda Ardern's Book Recommendations

Jacinda Ardern's Book Recommendations

Jacinda Ardern is a prominent New Zealand politician who served as the 40th Prime Minister of New Zealand from 2017 to 2023. Known for her empathetic leadership, she garnered international acclaim for her handling of the Christchurch mosque shootings in 2019, promoting unity and compassion. Ardern also led New Zealand through the COVID-19 pandemic with a strong public health response. In addition to her political career, she has contributed to literature by authoring several speeches and articles that reflect her progressive values and leadership philosophy. Her legacy includes significant strides in social welfare, climate change policy, and child poverty reduction.

View Collection
Ann Handley's Book Recommendations

Ann Handley's Book Recommendations

Ann Handley is a renowned digital marketing pioneer and a Wall Street Journal bestselling author. She is the author of "Everybody Writes," a seminal guide on creating compelling content, and co-author of "Content Rules," which outlines effective content marketing strategies. As the Chief Content Officer at MarketingProfs, she has significantly influenced modern marketing practices. Handley is also a highly sought-after keynote speaker, known for her insights on digital content and marketing trends. Her work has empowered countless marketers to elevate their content creation and strategy efforts.

View Collection
Anderson Cooper's Book Recommendations

Anderson Cooper's Book Recommendations

Anderson Cooper is an esteemed American journalist and television personality, best known for anchoring "Anderson Cooper 360°" on CNN. He has gained widespread recognition for his incisive reporting on major global events, earning multiple Emmy Awards for his work. Cooper is also an accomplished author, having penned the best-selling memoir "Dispatches from the Edge," which chronicles his experiences covering some of the world's most perilous conflicts and disasters. His literary contributions extend to "The Rainbow Comes and Goes," a poignant dialogue with his mother, Gloria Vanderbilt, that explores themes of family and resilience. Through his work in both journalism and literature, Cooper has made a significant impact on contemporary media and storytelling.

View Collection

"We are all shaped by the loves we have, the losses we bear, and the choices we make, tangled together in a dance of light and shadow."

With or Without You

By Domenica Ruta

Frequently Asked Questions